Ya want to know what really really gets on my nerves guys and dolls? Its bullies. You think as a kid that once you finish school and become and adult then bullies go away. This is not true in any way shape or form. Those high school bullies just take adult form. They still have bigoted opinions and instead of slinking down school corridors looking for prey they now hunt social media, eagerly waiting for a post to pounce on a person in the comments section.
And, maybe its just because of the majority of the people/pages I follow are women and magazines that are aimed at women, especially mums, that I find alot of the trolls and nasty comments are by other women! As you know in my previous blog post ‘Real Queens Fix Each Other’s Crowns.’ one of my biggest pet peeve’s is women hating on each other. Another pet peeve of mine is people thinking they can say something downright disgusting about someone and then saying ‘free speech’ ‘entitled to my opinion’ and ‘feminism’. It is not feminism to actively seek out to destroy another woman or indeed person. Feminism is about equality and choice; a person having an equal right to choose how they want to live and make decisions about their lives without fear of judgement or reprimand.
The sparks that has ignited this particularly blog post have come from two places: Youtube videos comment section, and an article by Glamour magazine regarding Kim Kardashian-West;s surrogacy news (read it here). Alot of the comments that people came up with genuinely made me want to move to an island all by myself and despair of the human race, and in particular women. The comments in particular that annoyed me were of the like ‘she cares more about preserving her beauty than she does carrying a child’ ‘she’s such a fame whore’ ‘who cares?’ ‘oh my god she is so selfish’ and even questioning why she didn’t adopt and instead chose a surrogate. Which is surely her own private choice and she does not have to justify that choice to anyone. The thing that made me actually laugh out loud (cringey I know but I couldn’t help it) was the fact that some of the trolls had not even read the article! The article in which Kim herself stated that her doctor herself had told her that if she was to have another child biologically then she could die. Hence why she has chosen for someone else to carry her child for her. Which again is her choice. So this is where your freedom of speech, irrelevant opinion is to be quite frank dog shite. Yes your entitled to freedomly speak your opinion, but at least make sure its an educated one mate!
I always wonder what examples this is also setting for other women who are struggling to conceive and are coming to make decisions like this themselves. KKW is in a public spotlight speaking openly about her problems to conceive and how this makes her feel and she is being slated for it. When really she should be given praise for speaking openly about this and helping others open up about it. As a woman and a mother it feels like we are judged for everything. Parent shaming is something I have talked about recently (read here). I understand that we live in a world where not everyone can be nice to each other and get along, far too many humans with far too many opinions for that. However, kindness and respect is free and a little goes a long way. The internet gives a sense of anonymity to these trolls. Which is why its so important to call them out, bringing their nasty, judgemental comments to the light.
Like my teacher at primary school used to say: if you have nothing of substance to say then don’t say it.